Friday, May 21, 2010

I have a shiny new bauble.

I have been making it for the past month or so with this hot man. A strong body, great hands, and skills like no other. He has a knowledge and a lack of shame that I find so hard to resist.

See, I am a slow to open up in a way. I am sort of shy and awkward at first in bed. I lack a confidence. That is until you get me warmed up, but I can only go as far as my partner will take me. I am not really an initiator, an explorer, but I so want to be. I am sort of a good girl that wants to be bad. Nah. I am not really that good. Just inexperienced.

I have had what I consider to be a lot of sex in my life, but not a lot of right sex. I mostly never really got sex and seldom really enjoyed it. I am a pleaser and I get arousal from a man getting off, but still, when some guy is just grunting and thrusting on top of you and it sort of is uncomfortable, even when he climaxes, it isn't that thrilling.

I never really open my mouth and asked for what I want. I am too embarassed to. It shouldn't be that way though. Sex should be a shared experience. It is about intimacy and openness with another person. As I mature, I try to ask for this or that, but still I am so stifled by some sort of shame.

When I was with Ex, I would make suggestions or say things or maybe sort of venture into the realms of deviancy, but he wasn't really there with me. I mean in four years, he never really put his hands on my pussy and I can count the number of times he went down on me on one hand and the amount of minutes on the other. I mean he had some mean hip action, but that was about it for us.

Now this guy, this little play thing, is amazing. He makes me feel so sexy, and I want to be adventurous with him. I feel open and comfortable and a willing participant. I still don't think I am too vocal about what I want, but I don't really need to be. He just knows. It is like he was made out of sex clay just for ID.

Oh sure there are other admiral qualities about him. It isn't just the sex. We dig on similar music. He is interesting to talk to. I think he is well read and intelligent. He writes well. Speaks well. Makes me laugh. He can cook-a notable quality for a foody such as myself. But let me get back to the sex.

I am not an easy sell when it comes to the orgasm. Even when pleasuring myself at times it eludes me. I would love to shout from the rooftops that this cat has pulled off the biggest heist of the year, but no. Unfortunately, not yet. But he is one hell of a trier.

He has this amazing cock that like never goes away. I mean he orgasms and then can just keep right on going, without missing a beat. Who does that? I have never heard of that in my life. I have seen someone quick to recover. Remember Koala? Please out there, if you are reading this and you know of someone else with this phenomenon let me know. Most guys I have ever been with are like a bear that has been shot with a tranq dart once they come-Done, over and out. Not my little wrestler. He just keeps right on pushing, thrusting, flipping me over.

And that is another thing. The bed acrobatics. Ok. Have you ever been with someone and you want to go from one position to another. It is bumpy and awkward and the dick seems to slip out. Once again, this is mostly my experience. I don't know if it is because he did wrestle or what, but he will pull my leg, lift his hip and before I know I am on the bottom.

So, I don't know how long I get to keep my shiny bauble. I don't know if it is more than sex. Sometimes I think I am crushing on him so hard and sometimes I think I am just enjoying my bedroom time. He has a crazy new schedule since he took a graveyard shift job, so I don't really get to see him a whole lot outside of a few encounters here and there. It helps to keep things in perspective. Having really good sex with someone I think can make you feel closer than what you may be. I like him. I am for sure on that. Just how much? Who knows.

1 comment:

  1. This post is whiny?! Who said that? This one was anything but whiny. It was sexy and fun and honest, but whiny. What is wrong with you people? what do i have to do to please you? Wow. Tough crowd.

    Smooches still,